This is a Comment by a PEPster named eva4you:
I’m sorry eva4you but, you see, I had a miscarriage, and it’s really difficult to write and entertain when you’re going through a depression. Siyempre, four years old na si Lia, naghahanap na ng kapatid. She was really looking forward to a baby “sister” (that was what she wanted). When I told her the baby never had a heartbeat (blighted ovum), she asked me, “So is the baby inside you dead?” Then she cried for thirty minutes.
Emil and I have been trying for a long time now, and with your prayers, PEPsters, I know makakubuo rin kami. I was scheduled for a D and C (Dilatation and Curettage), o sa Tagalog, raspa. But I was so scared because I was told I would undergo general anesthesia (G.A.).
Sa buong buhay ko never pa ako nagpa-G.A.! I gave birth to Lia via Lamaze (natural way of giving birth without administering anesthesia). I had my eyelids done with topical anesthesia only. Although the anesthesiologists may negate my opinion, but general anesthesia does impair part of your brain and causes memory gaps and losses. I know this for a fact because I have been speaking to many mothers and people that underwent general anesthesia, and all of them suffer memory loss in one way or the other. And so I begged my doctor, Dr. Raul Quillamor, to postpone my D and C. I asked for one more week and prayed na bumaba naturally ang baby because Doc Raul said if it doesn’t go down naturally in a week, it’s inevitable for him to perform a D and C. Otherwise, I will suffer.
Yesterday, God answered my prayers. It came out, amniotic sac, embryo….everything. I plan to bury it. Dapat sana pangalan niya Gio kasi sabi ng acupuncture doctor ko while feeling my pulse when I was pregnant that it was supposed to be a boy. Sayang talaga.
Ilang araw din akong umiyak mag-isa nang malaman ko three weeks ago na walang heartbeat ang baby. I asked the Lord why bad things happen to good people. Parang sinagot ako ng Panginoon dahil biglang lumabas sa utak ko ang Romans 8:28, “We all know that in everything God works for the good of those who love him, whom He has called according to his plan”. In simple words, bad things in your life are needed for the good things to come.
Minsan kasi hindi natin iniisip na may “ultimate plan” ang Diyos sa atin. Parang chess game ‘yan. May “secret plan” tayo para manalo at hindi ito alam ng kalaban natin.
Ganoon din ang Diyos. May magandang plano ang Diyos sa atin na hindi lang natin nakikita kasi ang pinagkakaabalahan natin ay yung paghihirap natin ngayon. Naalala ko tuloy and istorya ni Joseph the Dreamer. Isa siyang mabait na bata, pero ibinenta siya ng kanyang mga kapatid para maging slave sa Egypt. A classic example of bad things happening to a good people.
‘Tapos pagdating niya sa Egypt, nakulong pa siya.
Pero dahil doon sa mga pangyayari sa buhay niya, nakilala niya yung “butler” o alalay ng hari na nakakulong din. The butler was bothered by his dreams, which Joseph interpreted with the help of God’s guidance. Joseph said that the butler will be freed in three days. And so when the butler was freed, he told the King about Joseph interpreting dreams.
May mga panaginip pala ang hari na kinailangan ng kasagutan kaya hindi lang si Joseph napalaya, naging administrator pa nga siya ng hari at gumanda ang buhay niya. Kaya kung hindi si Joseph ibinenta ng kanyang kapatid at kung hindi siya nakulong, hindi niya makikilala ang butler na magpapakilala sa kanya sa hari. Maganda yung istorya, try niyong basahin, Genesis 37-44.
Inisip ko, si Joseph, kahit nung nasa kulungan na siya, hindi siya nagalit sa Diyos o sinisi ang Diyos sa mga masasamang nangyari sa kanya. Kaya naman di siya pinabayaan ng Diyos at tinulungan pa siya. Parang sa tao din ‘yan. Kung magalit ka o sisihin ang isang tao dahil sa ginawa niya sa iyo, sa tingin mo tutulungan ka pa ng taong yun kapag nangailangan ka? Kapag sinisi mo at inaway yung kaibigan mo, pinuputol mo ang relasyon mo sa kanya. Kaya kapag may masamang nangyari sa atin, huwag nating sisihin ang kahit sino, kahit ang ating mga sarili, lalung-lalo na. Huwag na huwag nating sisihin ang Diyos kung ayaw nating putulin ang ating relasyon sa kanya. Just pray and ask God to slowly reveal his marvelous plan for you. Believe me, everyone has a marvelous plan designed by the great Lord.
Parang cross-stitch project ‘yan. If you look at the back of a cross-stitch design, buhol-buhol di ba? Pero kung wala yung buhol-buhol na iyon, di natin maa-appreciate yung magandang cross-stitch sa harap. Kailangan natin ang mga buhol-buhol sa buhay natin to be able to appreciate the beautiful and great design God has planned for our lives. Be happy, PEPsters!
Also, you might have twins next time 
