Sagot muna sa comments from last entry:
Lezz: Sorry kung di kita nabati sa Clark. I couldn’t just say hi to everyone, especially if no one was saying hi to me. Napaka- assuming ko naman na gusto ako ng lahat ng tao. Mas disappointed yata ako na hindi mo napansin na busy ako with Quentin. Medyo hilo talaga ako pag kasama ko anak ko because he wants all my attention.
Euan001: Thank you for understanding. Gets na gets mo ako kapatid.
At sa lahat ng bumati, salamat po pero hindi pa po tapos ang kuwento…Yes friends, here’s the continuation of the story. Saang part na ba tayo? Tagaytay and singsing with matching flashback sa faces ng family ko. (CLICK HERE to read pevious entry.)
I wasn’t able to answer his question. I replied with another question: “Why? Don’t you think it’s too fast?
At sinagot nga naman niya ako ng, “Bakit sa tingin mo ba, e, bumabata ka pa?”
Thought Bubble: Parang papunta na sa insulto yung comment na yun.I couldn’t help but pour out my thoughts. I realized after going through such a rough marriage that to say “I Do” is not just about impulse or instinct or too much emotions. It’s a choice, and it’s a major decision would affect the people around us.
There are consequences and chain reactions that need to be thought of. Wow! Siguro nga, nag-mature na ako kahit papaano.
Heto pa ang itinakbo ng usapan namin…
Candy: “How ready are you?”
GB: “More than enough.”
Parang dialogue na ito sa pelikula. Iba pala pag reality na. Wala yung instant yes!Yes! Merong deep breathing exercise, closing of eyes, and a lot of fears, questions and confused emotions.
My yes wasn’t a simple yes. My yes came with a monologue or an explanation because we were confined in a situation where we both have separate responsibilities to our children.
Candy: “I think this is too fast. I don’t know kung bakit ka nagmamadali.”He always has an answer to my questions.
GB: “Bakit mo pa kasi pinatatagal, e, dun din naman ito pupunta. Unless you are not serious with us.”Parang nagulat at lalo akong nahirapan explain ang sarili ko sa statement niya.
Candy: “Of course I would like to marry you someday when things are already settled.”Then I added, “Pero kunwari hindi ko tinanggap yung ring mo at sinabi ko sa iyo na wag muna, ibig ba sabihin nun break na tayo?”
GB: “Nagpapatawa ka ba?”
Candy: “Hindi. Seryoso ako. Automatic ba yun pag hindi ko tinanggap yung ring, break na tayo? Or pag tinangap ko yung ring, ibig ba sabihin, I have to marry you soon? Saka, kung mag-no ako, paano ako uuwi, e, nasa Tagaytay tayo. Layo kaya nito.” At hindi pa ako nakunteto, nag-litanya pa ako ng mahaba with matching hand movements. Lalo namang lumalakas ang hangin sa Tagaytay.
Candy: “I am four years older than you. I don’t know kung talagang pattern mo yung mas matanda ang type mo. I have a special kid. Do you know what that means? Sacrifice or maybe even having to spend my whole life with him. How are you going to tell your kids? Honestly, I am flattered and almost in tears, but I worry about how it will affect your kids.”
Silence…
GB: “So ayaw mo?”
Candy: “Hindi naman sa ayaw ko. Pero importante sa akin ang church annulment because I think that is the right thing to do. Maybe, while we are processing our church annulments, that would be sufficient time to process ourselves, explain to the kids, get to know each other more, and see what’s going to happen from there. For a change, I want to start it right…to have a more stable relationship.”
GB: “Sa tingin mo ba hindi ko naisip ang lahat ng sinabi mo. Naisip ko na rin iyan.”There was this awkward silence of waiting.
Thought Bubble: Will I commit a sin if I get engaged without the Church annulment? Ano kaya ang reaction ng mommy ko? Ano kaya mangyayari?
GB pulled his chair beside me. He held my hands. It was really cold and the warmth of his hands was such a big help. Para kaming nagka- staring contest. We stared at each other trying to read each other’s minds. After some time, he stood up in front of me. “I know you are scared. I love Quentin. We will do our Church annulment. We will wait. We will do what is right, if that’s what’s going to make you happy.”
I pulled him and rested my head on his body. He embraced me and I held him back tightly and said, “Thank you. Thank you for understanding. Yes, I want to marry you.”
When I got home, I told my mom about it. Parang ako naman ang nag-propose sa mommy ko. Kasi yung reaction niya was exactly the same as mine. “Paano? Bilis yata? Bakit?” Hindi na ako masyado nagsalita dahil si GB na ang trumabaho to prove that he is serious and sincere.
Yes, I am engaged. I am engaged to get married.
For the time being, however, we need to fix some things para mas tama ang mga bagay-bagay. Akala yata ng iba pag engaged na ang tao, kailangan magpakasal na agad. Usually, yes. But we want a lasting relationship, and waiting and doing what is right can be such a wonderful experience.
Matagal ba ang church annulment? Hindi naman, as long as you sincerely follow all instructions and attend proceedings.
Bakit important ang church annulment? I found out that my son has improved much faster than the others…we have survived dying moments in our lives only by God’s grace. So, I want to be annulled in Church, and be given God’s grace.I need that. We all need that to survive this world also called jungle of life. We all are given second chances. I don’t want to blow my second chance. Nobody does…
So, again, for the time being, we (GB, my mom, sister MM, and myself) are back to our main concern of the moment: Christmas decor. It’s a good family bonding. Maliban sa nakikilala ng family ko si GB, na-i-enhance pa ang creative skills niya.
To top it all, may addition sa family pag Pasko. The more, the merrier, kaya bongga!Ang daming magandang puwedeng mangyari bukas. Pero sa nngayon, excited ako na batiin kayo ng “Merry Christmas!”
